HNT-23

Well I figured since it was 83 degrees yesterday and I was wearing shorts I would pick the leg series back up again.

Happy HNT.

Who Me???

Fusion has been memed as a “Thinking Blogger” and in accordance with the rules, has named five others, including myself with this honor. The rules are simple:

1. If, and only if, you get tagged, write a post with links to 5 blogs that make you think, not including the one who nominated you,
2. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme,
3. Optional: Proudly display the ‘Thinking Blogger Award’ with a link to the post that you wrote.



1. Oblivion-Well Oblivion's was the 1st blog I ever commented on. I had a blogger account for almost a year just lurking, mostly on Secret Brain. Then one of her posts just compelled me to comment. Her posts make me think, they remind me of a life I used to have, and I relate to her probably more than most bloggers I read.

2. Emily-There is a honesty and integrity in Emily's writing that I am drawn to. I appreciate her struggle in caring for her husband. And I respect her brutal honesty when she writes about her feelings for her husband, her questions about God, and her struggle to be a good mother.

3. Tired Mummy-I would like to say I identify with her but the truth is she is leaps and bounds ahead of me. I aspire to be her, I aspire to handle myself with the same honesty and grace she does. After a rough day I might write a post where I bitch and moan. Then without fail I will go to her blog and find she is going through many of the same things. I must admit it helps me and makes me feel better to know that.

4. The Secret Brain-Art's blog is the 1st blog I read regularly. I probably lurked there for a year before I commented. I was compelled by his struggle in his marriage as much as I was entertained by his stories. Art's blog has many facets that I enjoy the journal side, the stories, and the humor all tie together to make his one of my favorites.

5. McEwen-I have to add McEwen to my top 5 because I haven't read another blog that does a better job of representing autism. I love reading her posts and even though I almost never comment I read her regularly. And I find her writing to be thoughtful, honest, and very entertaining...

I didn't think I was supposed to choose the blogger who chose me, but Fusion you know you are one of my favorites, right? And I have to give Ed an honorable mention. His stories make me think, they make me think a lot, so much so that I don't read them when I am at work ;)

Much Better...

I didn't do anything special and I didn't go anywhere special but I had the best weekend. I just feel so much better. Like the strange gray cloud that has been over my head lately is gone. I just feel more like myself. I saw Corey today for the 1st time in two weeks. He needed more clothes and shoes. And I was able to see him and hug him. I didn't realize how much it was bothering me to have this terrible thing happen and then not see him. He didn't want to leave, I hope seeing me isn't going to cause trouble this week. But I can't deny I was so happy to see my baby...

HNT-22

Well I haven't felt inspired to participate in HNT lately. What is sexy about a big blue cast I would like to know. Then I saw Serenity's latest offering and really wanted to hide. But oh well right now I am the blogger with a big blue cast *hunches*. Propping my foot up whenever I can so it won't swell up like a balloon. This pic is me at work this afternoon...

Happy HNT.



Edit-well I don't know why but the pic is not working anymore :) So I guess I will have to come up with something a little more inspired...This is in response to Serenity's lovely HNT this week...

edit-well if you haven't downloaded the naked rope pic to your hard drive you have missed the boat lol. You didn't really think I was going to leave it up forever did you???

Five Questions: Interview Meme

I am answering the questions and I am also taking the rules from Ed as is. No need to change a good thing...

The Rules: Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me.” I respond by asking you five personal questions (I will leave these questions for you in my comments) so I can get to know you better. If I already know you well, expect the questions may be a little more intimate! You WILL update your journal/bloggy thing/whatever with the answers to the questions (please don't leave your answers in my comments unless you don't have a blog). You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the post. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Cat, here are your questions:

1. What kind of cat do you see yourself as, a tigress or a little kitty? Ok my first instinct is to say little kitty unfortunately I don't think I can pull little kitty off. How about a tigress in little kitty's clothing?

2. What was the strangest thing you have ever done with your hair? I went through a punk rock phase and I wanted my hair to be the same color as Tina Turner. But I am afraid to color my hair, so I used Sun In. A product I am sure wasn't meant for black hair. Let's just say the orange that was my hair all summer gave punk rock a new name :)

3. What is the first thing you do when you wake in the morning? Turn up the radio. I don't need the alarm clock I usually wake up five minutes before it goes off. I watch it and then I turn the music up...

4. Food TV or ESPN? Now this is a really tough question I love sports center but I watch Barefoot Contessa and $4o a day quite a bit too. But I guess if I had to choose I have to go with ESPN.

5. What one thing makes your mouth water just thinking about it? Hmm, white chocolate nut cookies preferably still warm and if there was coffee to go with it even better...

7 Days...

Well it has been 7 days since my ankle was broken. My standings so far aren't very good...Monday I went to work with the soft cast which is probably at the top of list of the dumbest things I have ever done. I did stay home and rest my ankle on Tuesday and Wednesday or at least I tried to. But there is no question I was up and about much more than anyone with a broken bone and a new cast should have been. Then Thursday I went back to work, drove myself there, and did much more moving around without my crutches than I am even willing to admit.

Friday night I tried to make up for the abuse to my ankle mostly because it had swollen up like a balloon. And Saturday I pouted like a 3 year old because I was finally doing what I should have done all week. Sit down and rest my ankle. The sun was out and Corey wasn't here and like a kid on summer break I wanted to go outside and play...But I have been pretty good today, stayed off my feet and when I was up I used my crutches. I am not sure if I have rested enough to make it to work tomorrow. My ankle still feels swollen and uncomfortable, so I am going to play tomorrow by ear...

Overall the weekend wasn't too bad I didn't realize what a freak I am. I don't like being hurt, and I don't like asking for help. I have driven my poor mom crazy and I have been the worse patient you can imagine. But I acknowledge this so that must count for something right???

Yet another meme...

I stole this from Kimba awhile ago...

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME:
1. Death-I could make it all pretty and involved but the bottom line is I am just afraid to die.
2. Failure-for me that would be not living up to my potential as a person... (what happens next with Corey)
3. Critters of any kind spiders, rodents eek.

THREE PEOPLE WHO MAKE ME LAUGH:
1. My 10 year old
2. Tom and Kimba
3. Shannon my oldest friend

THREE (four) THINGS I LOVE:
1. My Boys-the conversations I have with Cameron or watching Corey dance...
2. Great weather-I just love a beautiful day, it doesn't matter what my mood might be if I am outside and it's 70 degrees everything is wonderful.
3. Music - I love all different kinds of music-there isn't a time of day that I am not listening to music-but I prefer live music being at a concert soaking it all in is the best.
4. coffee-I love coffee and I can usually enjoy the other three while I am drinking a cup.

THREE THINGS I HATE:
1. pettiness - life is so short to spend time on things that don't really matter.
2. racism- I stole this answer from Kimba but it's true for me too.
3. ignorance

THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
1. Hatred
2. Fanaticism
3. Speed Limits :)

THREE THINGS ON MY DESK:
1. Tulips-my manager bought me lovely tulips.
2. Bongo and Curly Beanie Babies
3. A picture of my boys

THREE THINGS I'M DOING RIGHT NOW:
1. sitting at my desk eating lunch
2. elevating my leg to take pressure off my ankle
3. working

THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE:
1. Travel outside of the US
2. Make a significant change for Corey and if possible other people living with autism.
3. Rebuild my relationship with my mom.

THREE THINGS I CAN DO:
1. carry a child, mop the floor, and cook a meal at the same time.
2. Finish a report, right a post, and chat with 3 people or less at the same time :)
3. Speed read and type 75 wpm (I went to school for Paralegal)

THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY:
1. empathetic, I don't know why but I instantly connect with people, empathize with them.
2. goofy, I have a weird sense of humor and I am easily amused.
3. adaptable, I adapt to situations well it takes a lot to throw me off my game.

THREE THINGS I CAN'T DO:
1. hurt people, even when they have hurt me it is just not me.
2. waste, I can't afford it LOL
3. drive, there I admit everyone who says it to my face doesn't read my blog so I can admit it.

THREE THINGS I THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO:
1. your inner voice, it never fails.
2. more music - diversify - there is a whole range of amazing sound out there - I happen to agree with Kimba so I kept it.
3. The people you love, listen first always before you speak listen to them, it will keep them close.

THREE THINGS I DON'T THINK YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO EVER:
1. Nay sayers, who needs negative advice?
2. Haters-who needs jealous people around?
3. Bad music, there is nothing worse...

THREE OF MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE FOODS:
1. Rigotoni
2. chicken chimichanga
3. Bacon and spinach panini

THREE THINGS I'D LIKE TO LEARN:
1. Sign Language
2. how to play the guitar
3. a two handed back hand

THREE BEVERAGES I DRINK REGULARLY:
1. coffee
2. sweatened iced tea (it's the house wine of the south after all :)
3. white russian

THREE SHOWS I WATCHED WHEN I WAS A KID:
1. Wonder Woman
2. Mork and Mindy
3. The Bionic Woman

Adjusting...

There have been a million moments where I had to adjust to Corey's needs. The picture is of his first birthday. I was so proud of my handsome baby and I decided to throw this unreal birthday party for him. I invited 20 1 year olds (yes you didn't misread I was ambitious back then and 22 :) I had the balloons, the decorations, music and probably with the parents and hubby and my family more than 50 people at my house.

Corey hated it of course it was overstimulating for him. And the more people tried to hold him the more people showed up at our house the more he cried. Finally I had to take him inside and sit with him in the rocking chair. He liked "Losing My Religion" by R.E.M. still does actually. So I played Out of Time and rocked with him until he calmed down. I went outside and told everybody it was too much for Corey, apologized cut the cake and called it a day. There aren't any pictures from that fiasco.

The picture is on his real birthday a couple of days later. I picked up a cake after work and went to my mom's house. Mom and I sang Happy Birthday to him and I let him dig his fingers into the cake and make a mess. He didn't understand what to do with the candle even though I tried to show him so in the picture you can see it's still burning. He didn't care he had more important things on his mind.

I am adjusting to the crutches too. Corey's care provider is helping me a great deal and I am going back to work tomorrow (hopefully without too much trouble)...

What Happened?

Well Sunday morning my son (Corey) was having one of those mornings. Unfortunately I have to be the heavy with him. Everywhere else in his life he is given whatever he wants whenever he wants because he can throw his weight around or become aggressive. I can't allow that at home for obvious reasons and I don't think I would do him any favors long term if I did. So we had been in a battle of wills all morning and it finally came to a head around 11:30. I left the kitchen and walked towards the den and Corey jumped on my back. Not to piggyback but to try to push me down. I should insert here that even when he was trying to push me down it wasn't to retaliate he just wanted the extra snacks and he figured if I was on the floor he could get it. Anyway he jumped on my back and began trying to push me to ground. I have maintained the upper hand with him all of this time because I have strong enough legs to stand toe to toe with him when he decides to be aggressive. Unfortunately yesterday I was standing on a rug that slipped probably from the force of Corey pushing and me resisting. 238 lbs pushed down on my leg that was now off balance and I broke my ankle. And then he fell on top of me. I have a clean break all the way across on one side and a hair line fracture on the other side. The picture is of the soft cast I will wear for the next couple of days while the swelling goes down. Then I will get a hard cast that I will wear for 6-8 weeks.

But "what happened" is not the story it's what do I do now. Corey is with hubby who said, "well you can't manage Corey with that soft cast." Which left me and my mom with the impression he figures I can manage when I get the hard cast. As usual he is completely oblivious to what I do and what I will have to deal with wearing a full cast and trying to take care of Cameron and Corey by myself. It is my right ankle so I can't drive, I can't afford to be out of work for 8 weeks. The list goes on and on and with each hour I realize just how difficult this could be. And then of course the real elephant in the room is...I am not sure what the long term repercussions of this incident will be. I am not sure if I will be able to continue as I have with Corey. I guess all of it will play out in the following weeks...

Bleh!

A picture is worth a thousand words...

HNT-21

Well I didn't really know where to go after my last HNT. The problem wasn't the vinyl it was the boots...But I figured I would retire the legs series for awhile and try something new.

Happy HNT.

I am a dreamer...

I saw this on serenity's blog awhile back and figured I would steal it. I have to admit it's suprisingly accurate.

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Another Meme...

Okay yet another meme, stolen from Ed. I am also stealing some of the additional questions he added because I liked them :) I hope he doesn't mind...

What curse words do you use most? Well for most of my life I didn't use curse words. They just weren't used at my house and my friends didn't use them so they weren't in my frame of reference. But the last couple of years they have become part of my frame of reference and I guess I use fuck, wtf?, motherfucker (you get the drift) probably more than a southern lady should...oh well.

Do you own an iPod? Nope, I want one but #1 I am lazy I don't think I will ever get all the music files off my laptop and CDs onto an iPod. And #2 I am cheap I have satellite radio and plenty of files and CDs and I am not willing to spend the money on an iPod too.

What time is your alarm clock set to?Currently about 5:05am. I lay there for about 10 minutes and then get up and get my son ready (his bus arrives around 5:50).

Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Hmm, a year ago I would have said, take the picture. I am always the one with a camera I like taking pictures of my boys. But lately I have been experimenting with being in the picture and I am enjoying it as well.

What was the last movie you watched? Dances With Wolves, I know but I like the movie it was on AMC I was home...what can I say.

What CD is currently in your player? No Doubt Greatest Hits

Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? I hate milk, bleh! I only like it in my cereal not to drink on it's own.

Has anyone told you a secret this week? Hmm, nope I don't think so but it's only Monday the week is young.

When was the last time you had Starbucks? Saturday.

Can you whistle? Yep like a pro.

Did you watch cartoons when you were little? Yes I loved them, Josie and the Pussycats was a fave, Underdog, The Wacky Races, to name a few. Of course I had to watch all the marvel cartoons like spiderman and captain america to keep my brother appeased.

Do you own any band t-shirts? I am a t-shirt person I like to get one whenever I go to a concert. The comedy is I don't really wear t-shirts so I have a drawer full of concert shirts that I have never worn or only wear around the house.

What will you be doing in an hour? What I should be doing now LOL, working...

What was the last song you heard? Thank you by Dido

Last time you cried? Friday night I was watching the special on HBO about the prison scandal in Iraq. It just made me tear up.

Desktop or laptop? Laptop.

What’s the weather like? Beautiful, 65 and sunny.

What were you doing an hour ago? Taking my lunch break.

How many hours of sleep do you need to function? My son has conditioned me to survive on 4 hours of sleep. But I find if I get more I need more and I can't function. So even when he is not home I find myself up really late.

Do you eat breakfast daily? No, I usually plan to but wind up running late and miss it. But I have breakfast at least half of the time.

What did you do last night? I had a quiet dinner with my sons and then watched the L Word and called it a night. My son went to sleep at 2:30 :)

Do you use sarcasm? Who me? Of course not ;)

Do you sleep on your side/back/stomach? I sleep on my stomach even when I was pregnant I did most of the time.

Do you watch the news? Nope not really. I don't watch local news at all. I find the whole idea of 24 hour news a little obscene. I don't think it is healthy to be aware of every single event and disaster all over the globe and I don't want to know. I listen to public radio on the way to work and I check the headlines on the internet when I check my email. I think that is more than enough information.

Do you have any scars? A couple, one on my wrist from a terrible 10 speed accident when I was 11...

Do you fantasize about the men who read your blog? I kept this question because I found it very interesting. I don't really think of the people reading my blog in a sexual way. I know I have the HNTs and I put some posts out there that display my sexual side but I am never really thinking of it as a way to provoke. Provoke strangers who I don't see into what exactly? I look at the blog as a way to express myself. I hope to attract people with different points of view and form relationships through my blog. But I am not trying to be someone's masturbatory dream. Most of my life I have been very conservative almost negatively so. Because I wanted men to see me as a person not just something to try to have sex with. I used to wear clothes too big and ponytails everyday (still do that most of the time) and no makeup. All in an attempt to be viewed as a person. So it's pretty ironic for me to see the HNTs and my recent photos with R out for public consumption.

Would you sleep with someone you met originally through your blog? Another interesting question I decided to steal. I think the internet and blogging can be a way to meet people like any other. We all hide behind masks in real life and online and part of getting to know someone is getting beyond the masks. If I met someone and there was a spark or a connection I wouldn't let the fact that I met them online keep me from having a relationship. But I don't do random sex or hook ups just for the sake of sex. Sex I have had, it's not that hard to find and I don't see the point in just having it because I can with any random person I meet. And those rules would apply online as they do in my real life encounters.

Would you want a lover who was smart and plain or dumb and hot? What a terrible question LOL. Of course being "hot" is just not enough to arouse me. I would need someone smart and engaging or I would lose interest.

HNT-20

What do you post after a HNT with rope and a HNT with romance novels? How about a pic of me in a full vinyl outfit? I mean my legs are in it after all...

Happy HNT.